Kindergarten Cop 2

KINDERGARTEN COP 2
Running time: 100 minutes
Rated: PG-13 (for language and violence)
Distributed by: Universal 1440 Entertainment @2016
Release Date: May 17, 2016 (DVD premiere)

Twenty-five years after we were graced with the presence of the Arnold Schwarzenegger action/comedy “Kindergarten Cop”, someone goes and makes a sequel that no one really wanted. Not only did we get it, but we got a half-assed dog of a movie whose script could’ve literally been done by a kindergartner….in crayons.
Yes, Universal’s direct-to-video distribution is responsible for this latest debacle. Instead of Arnold Schwarzenegger this one around (who wisely turned down a role or even a cameo appearance for this one), we get Dolph Lundgren as a no-nonsense FBI agent Reed. He and his partner Sanders (Bill Bellamy) have just taken down an Armenian dealer. and now they need to acquire a flash drive containing the downloadable names of those placed under the Witness Protection Program. Thanks to a reliable witness, Reed is able to locate the drive. The only problem is, the drive is located at the prestigious (and fictional) Hunts Bay Academy. Since Sanders has already been to the Academy, because of an unreliable (and misunderstood) lead, it’s up to Reed to go in undercover to get results.
I actually believe the only reason this movie even exists would be so they could get a shout-out in a future Expendables movie that both Lundgren and Schwarzenegger’s characters were kindergarten teachers at one point. It pains me to see Lundgren in this. Once an 80s action star and a staple of DVD auctioneers in the mid-90s and even in the 2000s, I believe he only took this movie for a payback. Even in the IMDb trivia section it mentions that he turned this role down at first. I wonder what convinced him to come back. And what is it that an old guy has a love interest that is twenty-years younger than him? Sigh. I hope they don’t make a “Kindergarten Cop 3”, but I could be wrong since it has now entered the cheapness of the direct-to-DVD market.


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